Monday, August 1, 2011
Dear Facebook, We Need to Talk
We need to talk. I'm seeing other people. I know I've been distant lately. In fact, we never really talked about why I left you for a while a two years ago and I really feel bad about that. You wanna know why? You're like that studly rockstar boyfriend I dated in college who threw those really AWEsome parties & was so cool! You were so popular I couldn't resist you...even when I knew you were no good for me I kept overlooking your faults and taking you back. I HAD to have you but I really never liked it!
You were slutty! ....especially with my personal information! You spilled my secrets without hardly a blink or an "I'm sorry!" I knew that. Everyone knew that. Where was my privacy? I had to keep tweaking things to feel safe around you and every other week or month you let me down! I still don't know what to expect. I don't think I'll EVER fully trust you! At least I never payed any of your games.
With you, my worlds collided. All of a sudden it's like I'm at this party surrounded by all my old high school and college friends who were showing my new professional & librarian friends pictures of me from my partying hardcore punk rock, rockabilly, & new wave days! Without even asking me! WTH!? I had to go around & untagging and yanking them so that I could keep some semblance of professionalism. I had had it up to here, Facebook and I left you. Remember that? I just upped and walked away. Of course you didn't make it easy. For some reason it's easy to "take a break" from you but to totally leave and quit you I had to go through hell!
I stayed away from you for 6 months or maybe it was a year. All I know is that I almost felt shameful about it and no, I didn't blog about it then. Because I new I really should be AT THAT DAMN SOCIAL MEDIA PARTY! But I realized to do it properly I had to say goodbye to all my old high school and college friends and come back to you alone. I needed to be seen at that party but I came back on MY TERMS. For my web presence I had to be on FaceBook but I didn't have to like it. So yeah, you're hot and I used you as much as you used me but I never really liked it. I came back alone, open, transparent, and professional. Did you notice that I was chilly with you? Only throwing you a nod here and there with most of my love going to Twitter? Yeah, didn't think so. And frankly, not to sound shallow...though you're really popular and all you're not that attractive - that ALWAYS bothered me. Not like my first....MySpace!
I gave up my first social media BF... MySpace Tom for you! I had molded MySpace so well, dressed it up with my awesome HTML skillz, and pimped it out so great...then well it changed, it grew old, and I got tired of him & started seeing you. But now..
Now I'm leaving you for GooglePlus. Ok, not leaving per se. Thanks to a Chrome Extension I can connect you two (gee, you don't mind do you?) and thanks to If This Then That I've got my Google+ going to my Twitters (please do NOT ask me for an invite, I'm clear out :-( So....I really think that Google+ is going to satisfy my social media needs with my Twitters being first. The parties are better, more thoughtful - I'm definitely moving in better circles now. I can't see giving up my Twitters. I hope Facebook you don't mind...but really? I could care less if you do. HA! Booya!
Please, don't call me, I've set up a Gmail filter to skip my inbox on all your emails....and for gosh sakes and for the love of all that is holy.......
DON'T. POKE. ME.
Update: 5.1.12 We're broken up for good! And really, I doubt I'll ever come back. I even found a way around how to have a school FB page without compromising my own email address...ha! And G+?? Just keeps getting better.
So what kind of relationship do you have with the Facebooks? Do you see it changing with Google+? I'd love to hear what you think!